🎬 today we will talk about the ESSENCE of a BREAK UP ✨💙 is it BAD? is it GOOD? Do we really need to add an essence? You have to see the things the way they are, without clinging too much to their essence because the essence can change. Or because the essence is useless. Everything is impermanent.
Watch the VIDEO or read the BLOG POST
© Cantibeall and Cantibeall.com, 2015-2021. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Cantibeall and Cantibeall.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
“Look at the bright side”: We’ve all read this sentence before. Trying to make us find some sort of light in a dark moment. I know the light is there. You know the light is there. But it’s very hard to be able to perceive it and act on it. Let’s take for example a break up. You’ve been together for so long, you built a history together. You may ask: How good this break up can be? It’s not that the break up is good forever or bad forever. We want to avoid adding essences to things so strongly that it will makes us start thinking we will feel them forever. Remember: Not attributing essence so strongly to things can be a source of freedom.
17 - NOT ATTRIBUTING ESSENCE SO STRONGLY TO THINGS
CAN BE A SOURCE OF FREEDOM
If you attribute to this event the essence of loneliness, low self-esteem or self depreciation, if you attribute negative qualities in general, and you think that it will ALWAYS BE LIKE THIS, you WILL be carrying a lot of negativity inside your mind throughout the whole day. The whole week. Maybe carry with you for a year. You have to see the things the way they are, without clinging too much to their essence because the essence can change. Or because the essence is useless. Everything is impermanent.
You may want to ask “Okay girl, if I don’t attribute essence to things, what is the purpose of living? I mean, a boyfriend will only be a boyfriend, there would be no love. A break up would be a break up, there would be no sadness or even happiness.” Well… I’m not saying that you cannot feel anything, that you’re a robot. I am saying that you have to feel these emotions, give them attributes (loving, caring, delicious, bad, sad), but not cling to them so strongly. By not clinging to them so strongly I mean not carrying them with you throughout the day, the months, the years.
18 - GREEN TEA STILL TASTES LIKE GREEN TEA
YOU LOSE THE CARRY FORWARD OF THAT SENSATION
Remember: Green tea still tastes like green tea. You lose the carry forward of the sensation.
What I’m trying to say is: we have various narratives and interpretations of random things in our life. We have conceptions about things and events. These interpretations and conceptions can shape the way we FEEL about things! When we FEEL in a specific way about something specific, we create an essence to this individual thing. We attribute essence to each individual thing we encounter in our daily life. The stronger the feeling, the stronger the sense of essence.
And the lesson number 1 is: FEELINGS AREN’T RELIABLE GUIDES TO REALITY
We have a break up. First we feel the pain. We attribute that a break up is really bad, the essence of the break up is bad, because there is pain. If we haven’t given any essence to it, we wouldn’t have clinged so much to the pain. So HOW do we lessen the power of the sadness, the essence of being something bad?
It is said that through MEDITATION you can become less reactive to things. You could start to see things as having less essence, seeing things without any essence, in a sense…. SEEING THINGS more empty.
16 - IF YOU ARE NOTHING
IF YOU DISAPPEAR
YOU CAN THEN BE ALL
Of course that seeing things as something EMPTY is another level, a higher level, something for experienced people. But don’t you want to get closer to that experience? Perceive visual qualities but not the essence of something? Being able to control how you feel. Being able to control how you perceive things. Perceive the emptiness. Or for some people, perceive the fullness of life.
A break up can be a new opportunity. Or it can be nothing. Or it can be all.
© Cantibeall and Cantibeall.com, 2015-2021. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Cantibeall and Cantibeall.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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