this song was written and recorded only two days before i took a huge step and moved to vancouver, british columbia.
at the time, i was staying in a small den close to the beach, mostly with my laptop in bed, trying to figure out what i was supposed to do next. i had studied hard, worked hard and done everything i thought i was supposed to do.... but i was still looking for a job, looking for direction and wondering why adulthood felt so uncertain.
"meritocracy" came out of that exact moment.
i wanted to be independent, but i also wanted to feel free. i wanted stability, but i didn’t want my life to become only work. i had dreams, but no clear path to them yet. that is why the song keeps asking where destiny is.... because i genuinely had no idea.
looking back, it feels like the perfect beginning for "2016, life". two days later, i moved to a much bigger city and entered a completely different part of my life.
originally shared only with friends and family on april 5, 2016, this song was officially released under CANTIBEALL years later as part of the surprise release of "2016, life".
songwriting by CANTIBEALL®
produced and mixed by CANTIBEALL®
mastered by CANTIBEALL®
1. meritocracy
25 years later i ask why
the reason i came to life
oh reason why are you so shy?
25 years later i ask why
the mirror cannot describe
all my dreams that i’ve inside
meritocracy couldn't answer me why i'm still in bed
meritocracy didn't prove to me life is horizontally
and i say hey
can you hear me now?
my eyes are far from you
is it one or two, or three or one or two?
destiny where are you?
hey
show me what you are
my soul is far from you
is it blue? i drew, you saw it but it flew
destiny where are you?
25 years later i ask why
my parents don't need prozac
i hope soon i give the payback
25 years later i ask why
i worry all the time
uncertainty should be a crime
meritocracy couldn't answer me why i'm still in bed
meritocracy didn't prove to me life is horizontally
and i say hey
can you hear me now?
my eyes are far from you
is it one or two, or three or one or two?
destiny where are you?
hey
show me what you are
my soul is far from you
is it blue? i drew, you saw it but it flew
destiny where are you?
can you hear me now, oh can you hear me now?
🛏️ 💻 🌊 🧭
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